Do you even know how hard it is to be a celebrity? You have to drive
nice cars and load them with all that gas. Do you know how hard it is
to be paid millions? Lifting the briefcase gets really hard after a
certain point. Do you know how hard it is to wear diamond rings?
Fingers hurt from the weigh and the bling bling damages the
eyes. On top of that you have to talk on your cellphone – a lot. Do
you know how hard that is? No, wonder celebrities do drugs – it's
needed to survive in the tough world of the rich man. I love
celebrities. If it wasn't for them I would have less people to hate
on.
When you are rich and famous you live a life that seems to be out of
this world – it's like you are on another planet – the planet of
first world problems such as: But mommy, my friends said I look gay
in that dress. Life is unfair and sucks. Fuck you mommy! Fuck you! I
want a new dress. Fuck you mommy! Fuck!
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| Image via: animalnewyork.com |
Money and fame spoil celebrities and give them false perception of
reality. When there are bitches around and the toilet seat is golden
it's really hard to think about how the world has become a living
hell for many. It's so hard that in most cases it's better to forget
that poor countries even exist. The fact that most celebrities think
Africa is in Australia helps. How cool is that? Probably this is why
my teachers said imagination is very important.
However, some celebrities are smarter. They see through the garbage.
They see through the fake. This is when they start doing PR campaigns
to help the poor. When you have USD 100 M in the bank USD 100 don't
look as a serious financial loss. It's a just one dose of cocaine –
nothing more nothing less and you can always borrow from a friend.
For good or for bad there are celebrities who move beyond that phase
in order to reach the next one called – I hate myself.
When your hunger for things is finally satisfied and you see how we
are all fucked up real bad a great depression occurs. A depression so
bad that even the girl with the greatest tits cannot save you from
it. You can try to hide in her tits as much as you want but
eventually you face the problem and you start asking yourself – why
is the planet such a fucked place and what is the point of it all? At
times like these drugs are your only friend. They fix everything.
Suddenly, the miserable things in life disappear and you can enjoy
your money and cars once again. Who are you not to? After all, the
dick of that film director didn't suck itself – if was you who did
all the hard work! Don't let others take that away from you! Fight
for your rights. Tweet about it if you have to. Do something!
It's hard out there for a celebrity – you gotta smile when you
don't wanna smile. It's harder than it looks because you may fake it
with your face but you can't fake it in your heart when you know the
truth about how stupid everything is and how severe the damage is.
It's hard when you know the truth – it's like waking up from a long
coma. A coma we are forced to love but which ultimately ends in
suffering.
Fuck that, where is Molly? Have you seen Molly? I am looking for
Molly but I can't find her. Damn. This time I will have to
satisfy myself with just Marry. Whiz Khalifa knows what is the real
deal.