1.When you are stuck in
the elevator you are stuck in the elevator no matter how much money
you have. What are you going to do? Buy a new elevator while you are
in the old one? I guess if you own the building people will be more
cooperative but still – you are stuck motherfucker.
2.When you fall from an
airplane and find yourself on a deserted island. Nature does not care
about money. It's a man made concept.
3.When you try to
resurrect someone. Sorry, this product and services are not available
right now. Try again later. Have a good day!
4.When traveling in space
– you just can't find a bank willing to accept your currency. Fuck
those monopolistic aliens.
5.When trying to un-fuck
someone who have already fucked – sorry.
6.When you are traveling
on the Great Titanic. Money can't make you feel warm in the freezing
Atlantic Ocean.
7.When trying to change
the color of your skin. MJ tried it. Didn't work.
8.When trying to change
your parents.
9.When you want to become
a cat.
10.When you are a cat.
11.When a murderer is
pointing a gun to your head but you can't talk in order to inform
him/her that you are loaded with cash.
12.When trying to have sex
with Catherine Zeta-Jones. She already has plenty of it.
13.When you are a man who
wants to get pregnant. Sorry son.
14.When you want to make
the day longer and the night shorter. You can't cheat nature.
15.When you are in casino
that only accepts bananas.
16.When you want to change
your DNA.
17.When you want to buy a
new body but keep the brain.
18.When you want to turn
water into wine.
19.When you want to turn
wine into water.
20.When you understand
that all money is made by the Federal Reserve and is not worth the
paper it's printed on.
