Thursday, January 30, 2014

25 Ironic Answers To The Question: “Do you even lift?”


1.Yes, brah. I lift and I am also in love with myself. You miring? {shows biceps}

2.Yeah, brah. We lift things and we put them down. {lifts a pencil and puts it down}

3.Yeah, brah. I always use the elevator. {hates the stairs}

4.No. I have a life, brah, and I am not narcissistic. {actually lifts but feels too small to admit it}

5.No, brah. Lifting is like masturbation – I like the real thing. {masturbates a lot}

6.Why would I lift? You die anyway. {still lifts hoping to look good at 70 years of age}

7.No. Girls don't care about muscle. They only love money. {correct, but still lifts because there is no money in the bank}



8.No. Only people with small dicks lift. I don't need it. {has a small dick and does push-ups}

9.No. I don't like steroids. {actually lifts and buys every supplement under the Sun}

10.Yes, I want to be like Layne Norton. {masturbates to a picture of Layne Norton}.

11.Yes. I squatted 405lbs yesterday. { fat fuck who weights 250 lbs }

12.Yes, I want to be like Mark Rippetoe. {fat fuck who wants to stay fat forever}

13.No, that's for rich people. {does pull-ups on the monkey bars and spends USD 500 on gas}

14.No, I don't have time for it. {plays 5 different video games a day}

15.No, God does not want me to. {prays to the image of Buddha}

16.No, my girlfriend says I look perfect without lifting. {girlfriend cheats all day every day}

17.No, people in the gym are very stupid. {goes to McDonalds's instead}

18.No, what's the point – when you stop muscle turns into fat. {brain dead}

19.Yes, yesterday I bought the latest supplements from T-Nation. {brain dead}

20.No, it's boring. {reads comic books}

21.Yes, it's so cool. {reads comic boos between sets}

22.No, I am not insecure. {trains karate}

23.Yes, I want to become a sex God and kettlebell swings help with that. {has sex only on birthdays, not his}

24.No, I don't care how I look naked. {looks in the mirror before a shower}

25.Yes, but I do it for health reason. {posts pictures on Facebook}

6 comments:

  1. things have turned pretty bad the last couple years though... after zyzz era - yes you heard me zyzz era,bbing changed its point of view. Now if you are not a shreadded fuck,you dont even lift,you suck and you have bad genetics. Seriously youtube is filled with steroid users all over,and you cant seem to find a natural guy. Zyzz actually did a really bad thing in bbing. Although he inspired a lot of people to start lifting,and thats a great thing he did,he actually passed a point of view in bbing that actually ruined it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The mentality on bodybuilding sites is pretty low.

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    2. what do you mean by that? sorry i do not understand what you are implying :)

      Delete
  2. Re: reasons number 11 and 12. I looked at that web site and it seems you are correct.

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  3. Not sure about the whole weight:squat ratio, but in my mind anyone that can atg a 405lb squat has my 'squat' admiration. the rest of their character is debatable LOLOLOL As an aside, I wouldnt mind being 70 and still active in the gym, even if that means doing 5lb db curls while checking out the 19y/o hotties (friggin perv!!!!!!)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I bet you can't guess which muscle in your body is the #1 muscle that eliminates joint and back pains, anxiety and excessive fat.

    This "hidden survival muscle" is in your body and it will boost your energy levels, immune system, sexual function, strength and athletic power when unlocked.

    ReplyDelete