Friday, January 10, 2014

Johnny's Adventures In The Muscle World: Road Trip

For the previous chapter click here.

Johnny and California Muscle have been able to successfully avoid all gun fire and were now on the road. Thanks to Cali's skills developed in prison he was able to steal a small car. It was a Blueberry a.k.a Toyota Echo or the car used by the characters Gus and Shawn from the TV series Psych. It was not much but nobody would have expected a big man like California Muscle to travel in similar vehicle. After a few hours of driving it was already dark outside and Little J was very hungry. The nice thing about going on a road trip with a bodybuilder was the fact that you don't have to explain to him or her why eating was so important. In general, bodybuilders hate missing meals because they have developed so severe body dysmorphia that doing something like this even once was making them feel small and weak. Every serious bodybuilder has experienced this nasty feeling at least a few times. Once Cali and Little J we in the dinner room they sat at well hidden table and started discussing their options.
'The way I see it we, either have to relocate to another city or whack everybody related to Crap Is Golden Gym, otherwise we might just as well lay in the coffin.', said California Muscle while checking out the ass of the waitress who was a tall blonde lady with a short skirt.

Both options presented by California Muscle were not acceptable by Little J since relocating meant quitting college and forgetting about the sexy Crossfit girl he was not able to get out of his head fortmonths now. Killing anybody was also an experience he didn't want to have.

'No way! There is always a better option! Why don't we just go back and pay the stupid fine to Crap Is Golden Gym!, said Little J who was obviously unaware how severe was the problem.

'Look, the problem is not the fine. The problem is what happens after. In case you forgot who is the manager of the gym I will refresh your memory – it's Antonio Montana. He is the biggest supplier of protein powder and cocaine in the whole region. We will never be able to live a normal life at that place ever again!', said Cali Muscle who was obviously proud to be able to say more that a few words before going out of breath due to his massive size and poor cardiac-vascular condition.

'Why don't we ask CT Flat Brain for help? He's helped us once. Maybe he will do it again?', asked Little J.

'Forget it. I don't ever want to see that man ever again. Never. Forget it!', replied Cali and started eating the twelve eggs he ordered. The waitress was still on the back of his mind.

'Why no? What's your problem with him? He seems like a nice guy? Please tell me you are not just jelly* of his huge biceps! Although if you are I would understand.', asked once gain Little J.

'He is a traitor man. He fucked my mother and then left her.', was saying Cali Muscle when he was interrupted by Little J.

'So, this is your dad? Why didn't you tell me?', said Little J when the hot waitress put an expensive bottle of Scotch whisky on the table.

'Compliments from the gentlemen at the end of the bar.', said the waitress whose name was Molly and had a voice perfect for reading erotic novels.

Unfortunately for Little J and California Muscle the gentlemen at the end of the bar were cops smiling at them with an expression meant to stay: “We got you, losers!”.

California Muscle was scared to death. There was no way in hell he was going to jail for something as innocent as being the trainer of someone who dropped a heavy barbell on the floor during a deadlift. What the hell was that? He grabbed Molly, broke the bottle of Scotch by hitting the table and pointed the sharp glass left in his hand towards the external carotid artery of the waitress.

'Drop your weapons or I am going to slice her throat', said Cali who new very well he wasn't ever going to do something like that. Being officers of the law the cops had no choice but to put their weapons down.

The two men and the waitress slowly moved towards the exit and in a few short instances were already in the Blueberry.

For the next part click here.
* jelly - slang for jealous;